I am a teacher of Business and English based in Bangkok Thailand and have been teaching academic writing for the last 10 years as well as being an academic examiner.
Each week I will be adding new essays for task 1 and task 2 to show how a good answer looks. If you have have questions that you would like to have a model answer for, then please leave a comment on this Blog with your essay question or a link to a task 1 graphic.
Each essay was written in the appropriate time (40 minutes for a task 2 and 20 minutes for a task 1) and they were all written under examination conditions.
Question: Happiness is important in life. Why is it difficult to define? What factors are important?
Answer:
Of course, everyone desires to be happy rather than sad in the same way that most people would prefer to be rich rather than poor. There is no doubt that happiness is the ultimate goal of people but therein lies a problem; happiness is almost possible to define in concrete terms that are generally applicable to all and there are also many factors that are important in determining happiness in a person’s life.
The concept of happiness is very difficult to put into words. Firstly, it is an abstract and not a physical concept that is very subjective in that every single person will define it in a slightly different way. It also relies on a multitude of factors which will be different depending on who you ask which will in turn rest upon demographic of cultural considerations such as a particular stage of life a person is in, their geographical location and their socialisation within their respective culture. In particular, although we can say that there are some general factors that do lead to happiness more often than not, the level of emphasis will be vastly different from person to person,
The first factor that lead to a happy life is a person’s personal life. Being part of a loving family where one is valued, where a person can have a role that positively influences other people that they care about and also be cared for not only gives you happiness but also allows happiness to permeate the very fabric of familial existence. Having good friends is also very important, other people you can turn to for help or advice in times of trouble or times of need. These two aspects of friends and family are a very important aspect for anyone to achieve happiness.
The second factor would be for many people a fulfilling work life. A job that gives satisfaction and a feeling of self worth where success is achievable that can lead to greater self esteem, promotion or even a higher salary. We spend so much time at work, it is important to do something we love and not wake up every day hating the idea of having to go to work. We should live to work and not work to live.
The third and final factor should be leisure time and what we can do in our spare time; this is also a significant factor in determining happiness. This again will vary from person to person. Some people just require time to unwind by watching movies, sleeping, in general, just having personal time ot unwind. Others try to again happiness by improving either themselves by for example study , playing sport or by reading. The might also try to improve their environment with DIY or gardening activities. Other people like to spend time also or socialising with their friends. Ultimately having free time for doing things you choose to do is very important in achieving the goal of happiness.
To conclude, there are so many factors that determine happiness and they will all be different slightly for every person in the world. It should be emphasised however that a loving personal life, a fulfilling occupation and spare time to pursue personal interests are all key for most people in order for them to be happy.
(550 words)
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AS a teacher of this area, I find that student have a hard time just writing the limits of the test. Yet, your model answers are not IELTS response but academic paper ones, for the word count is not attainable inside the time limits for non-native writer and low level English learners. I appreciate the usefulness of the content and we do use them in class in how to reduce material that is not needed.
ReplyDeleteOther than this portion of the website the rest is great for learners.
Ernest
Thanks for your comment Ernest. I might get round to writing some Band 6 stuff in the near future but I wanted to focus on what a really good answer would entail to get the higher band scores.
ReplyDeleteMost candidates struggle to get above a 6 and the intention of the blog is to help all students know what is required. If you have any questions or topics you would like to see in the future, please let me know. I will be covering speaking topics in more detail soon and also having a look at Task 1 Writing.